Roulette

I guess I just don't trust you. I don't like that you are still meeting with her. I don't like the fact that you told me she has a boyfriend and she is 'single' according to her relationship status. Yes, I'm a stalker. Yes, this argument is invalid.
But I told you that I'm just afraid of being hurt. More than i was afraid before. And if I discover you cheat on me with her I guess I will hate you. Just hate you because why did you ask me to come back in the first place. To be a toy in your hands?
I guess I just learnt to expect the worst from you.
And I guess it is better when some things remain unspoken.

And I guess I just don't know

And here we go again. When I was with you it felt like those past three months didn't happen, that we never said goodbye. It is always so normal and just ok when you are around. Like being with a friend who at the same time is your lover.
And now I'm back home and I'm not sure how I feel about you. Because during those months I was doing my best to forget about you, to tell myself that you are gone, even dead. I guess i don't love you anymore. You are someone special and you will always stay in my heart, but it's not that sweet, innocent feeling anymore. But I was to weak to say 'no' and now I'm to weak to leave again. I can't imagine not being close to you.

Now I'm just the ghost in the corner that nobody knows

maybe I'm also somebody's imaginary friend.
maybe someone has an imaginary friend who in fact is me.
You can never be sure about that stuff.